April 18, 2011

A good pie is hard to find.

"What kind of pie?"
"Apple." Kote straightened and cut three careful slits into the crust covering the pie. "Do you know how difficult it is to make a good pie?"
"Not really," Chronicler admitted, then looked around nervously. "Where's your assistant?"
"God himself can only guess at such things," the innkeeper said. "It's quite hard. Making pies, I mean. You wouldn't think it, but there's quite a lot to the process. Bread is easy. Soup is easy. Pudding is easy. But pie is complicated. It's something you never realize until you try it for yourself."
--The Wise Man's Fear, Patrick Rothfuss

Patrick Rothfuss is an extraordinary writer. And he's right about pie: It's complicated. So many components can go awry: crust too pasty, filling too gloppy, topping too crunchy.

Enough with the zombie Jane Austen novels. What I really need to see at Barnes & Noble is the pie companion to Flannery O'Connor's "A Good Man is Hard to Find," in which an escaped convict holds a grandmother at gunpoint but instead of killing her, forces her to eat a disgusting pie from Denny's. Who wouldn't want to read that, I ask.

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